Thursday, October 4, 2007

In Response to Adam's Comment on the Pee Pee

I feel it is time that I tell the world something I realized many years ago. We men spend too much time standing in front of toilets while not peeing. Clearly, each trip to the rest room only contains a couple of seconds of wasted time, but if you start trying to pee a couple seconds before you "free yourself," you can start peeing immediately. Do that a few thousand times, and think, how many more burritos could you noooook? The most important thing about this strategy is to not piss yourself. If you screw up, just once, it will take months to make up for all the time that you'll spend cleaning those pants. If you're lucky, you'll have your microwave and washing machine on different circuits, so you can cook burritos while you clean the pee out of your pants. In closing, I am not a woman, but my small knowledge of the gender that is women leads me to believe that this strategy should work wonders for them also.

- Seth


Carrie said...

I thought it was "nuke" not "nooook." I was very confused by nooook and said all of those long oooooo's in my head.

AdamB said...

I tried this a couple times, and found that the best method seems to be letting loose the stream whilst still walking toward the urine receptacle.

The problem is that you have to keep the stream steady as you shuffle nearer as the stream speed diminishes.